Children or Partner First?

Whose needs come first?

If you have children of your own, it is very important to make them your top priority after they have suffered the loss of a parent through death, divorce or separation.  They need plenty of time to grieve and adjust to their loss before placing them in a blended family environment.  When you remarry or start living with a new partner, the needs of your partner and your couple relationship must be considered in conjunction with your children’s needs.  After all, if you don’t have a secure relationship, you can’t achieve a stable environment for children.  This only sets them up to suffer another loss.

When you are 100% committed to your couple relationship it makes it easier for children to adapt

If I were to say you must put your ‘couple relationship’ or ‘your children’ first, then someone must inevitably come second.  However, if couples make each other’s needs a priority, it paves the way for them to work together towards meeting the children’s needs as a unified couple.  If stepparents feel their needs are met within your relationship, they are more likely to want to make an effort with their stepchildren.

In your couple relationship, make each other’s needs a top priority by discussing all important decisions affecting your family

Take each other’s thoughts and feelings into consideration when making choices, to ensure you are acting with your partner’s interests in mind.  Children’s needs still remain a top priority for both you and your partner to address together.   Of course this is much easier said than done.  The thing is, every blended family goes through tough times.  Some survive.  Many don’t.  What makes the difference?

Each couple is faced with 3 choices during the difficult times.  They either:

1. Give up, move out and on to another relationship which unfortunately has just as much chance of failing
2. Continue doing what they’ve always done, knowing it doesn’t work
3. Choose not just to survive but thrive by using some positive strategies

Want to make your relationships thrive?

Click here to assess what your current priorities are, strengthen your relationship and receive effective communication techniques…

Warm regards

Adele Cornish

p.s. You’ve got nothing to lose and lots of effective strategies and solutions to gain!  Discover how I can help you, just click here